With what existential crisis are you grappling right now?

[The Monkey]

I prefer to just break the packaging open all fast and see if the crumbs land on anything interesting in the vicinity. If the big pieces stay in there I call it a good day.

This. Plus cursing.

[luvdunhill]

wait.. now I have a drill press. Let's see...

[aardvark baguette]

I've found that gravitational pull and package orientation have precisely zero influence on my ability to draw out the crumbs as I pull out the larger pieces. Its as if they create a vortex that draws them out. All over my desk and mousepad.

[manaox2]

I seem to eat my oats and honey bars fine and then pour the crumbs in my mouth. I'll have to watch to see how I do it next time. Maybe it helps that I get them out of a vending machine in a vertical position. Maybe if I break the bottom of the bars off and eat the top pieces first and then eat the small pieces down in the package and then pour the crumbs, that seems like a good plan. I hope thinking about it hasn't jinxed me.

[The Monkey]

I've found that gravitational pull and package orientation have precisely zero influence on my ability to draw out the crumbs as I pull out the larger pieces. Its as if they create a vortex that draws them out. All over my desk and mousepad.

That's why you open them in your co-worker's space.

[aardvark baguette]

your ideas intrigue me...

[morphsci]

i ingest the bar unopened and excrete the wrapper later. no muss, no fuss and no toilet paper needed.

FTFY

[Hopstretch]

Has there ever been a less impressively-named audio product than the Von Gaylord Chinchilla?

[swt61]

Well the Von Gaylord Gerbil might have been worse.

[Grahame]

^

Richard Gere Signature Edition?

^^ "Without waxing poetic, this is a spdif cable capable of transforming a system on its own. Fast, soulfully quiet, articulate, revealing without grain, extended, nuanced and graceful. This is the recommended 'sweet spot' length of 2m. Digital information transfer at its best. Proprietary locking RCA's."

And all for a Kilobuck! (used) down from 2.5 Kilobucks.

[Sherwood]

Once more, with feeling:

"Soulfully quiet"

[guzziguy]

Has there ever been a less impressively-named more over priced audio product than the Von Gaylord Chinchilla?

This also applies.

[Hopstretch]

Which is FOTM-thier, JH13 or ULN-2?

[The Monkey]

Which is FOTM-thier, JH13 or ULN-2?

Trick question! It's vinyl, of course.

[Dusty Chalk]

That's easy -- ULN-2. Especially if you interpret as "Flavor of This Month".

[Grahame]

^ JH13 via ULN-2? with alcohol and ...

[Wmcmanus]

I haven't cut my grass since I visited Cayman in mid August. It's getting kind of high now, but I didn't remember to disconnect the battery of my riding lawn mower while I was away this summer, so I'll be needing a new battery.

Been thinking maybe I ought to call the guy who cuts the grass for me in cases like this, which tend to happen about once per year. He's got a crew of 6 guys who can knock it out in an hour for about $120 and a pizza or two.

But it just won't ever stop raining for long enough to allow a 2 feet high field of weeds and bush (err, grass) to dry out enough to be cut. There is one patch with some wild weeds that are now well over my head, probably pushing 8 feet high.

Thankfully, my neighbors have a sense of humor and know that I mean well. That, and Santa brings candy for their kids at Christmas time.

[luvdunhill]

Been thinking maybe I ought to call the guy who cuts the grass for me in cases like this, which tend to happen about once per year.

perhaps what you need is a few goats... or a machete... or controlled burn

[Wmcmanus]

Seriously, goats would do it. My next door neighbor is from Trinidad, and that's exactly what he suggested with a "You know what we do back home..." lead in. The good thing about it is that nobody would ever even think about robbing this place when the yard is a mess like that.

[HeadphoneAddict]

I haven't cut my grass since I visited Cayman in mid August. It's getting kind of high now, but I didn't remember to disconnect the battery of my riding lawn mower while I was away this summer, so I'll be needing a new battery.

Been thinking maybe I ought to call the guy who cuts the grass for me in cases like this, which tend to happen about once per year. He's got a crew of 6 guys who can knock it out in an hour for about $120 and a pizza or two.

But it just won't ever stop raining for long enough to allow a 2 feet high field of weeds and bush (err, grass) to dry out enough to be cut. There is one patch with some wild weeds that are now well over my head, probably pushing 8 feet high.

Thankfully, my neighbors have a sense of humor and know that I mean well. That, and Santa brings candy for their kids at Christmas time.

You could always just smoke the weed.

[manaox2]

Sounds like you need a thresher instead of a lawnmower.

Seriously, goats would do it. My next door neighbor is from Trinidad, and that's exactly what he suggested with a "You know what we do back home..." lead in. The good thing about it is that nobody would ever even think about robbing this place when the yard is a mess like that.

They may wish to squat in it however, guerrilla forces may make your home a base.

[Chekhonte]

I've been spending the past 3 years struggling with my limitations to create observably perfect forms in hand built ceramic sculptures. It's been driving me mad this past month.

On a more existential note I got stoned last week and bought a snickers bar, when I opened it there was some sort of larva in it. It put everything in my life in question how could there be a god that let this type of thing happen.

[nattonrice]

Perhaps your god thought you needed extra protein in your diet?

[manaox2]

I've been spending the past 3 years struggling with my limitations to create observably perfect forms in hand built ceramic sculptures. It's been driving me mad this past month.

On a more existential note I got stoned last week and bought a snickers bar, when I opened it there was some sort of larva in it. It put everything in my life in question how could there be a god that let this type of thing happen.

Mad artists sometimes make legendary artists.

God invented both larva and snickers. And it was good.

[Dusty Chalk]

I've been spending the past 3 years struggling with my limitations to create observably perfect forms in hand built ceramic sculptures. It's been driving me mad this past month.

On a more existential note I got stoned last week and bought a snickers bar, when I opened it there was some sort of larva in it. It put everything in my life in question how could there be a god that let this type of thing happen.

Pick one:

(a) There isn't.

( There could, but He gave all of us freedom and free will, to fuck up as you so please.

© Cosmic Jokester is laughing at your distress.

Next question?