Review: Britts Donuts, Carolina Beach, NC

[Wmcmanus]

Prebable:

Jeff (VPI Vinlyspinner) was kind enough to invite me to indulge in a taste test of a matched pair of small, round (with a hole in the middle) glazed donuts from Britts. I was happy to oblige. Actually, he just did a head nudge towards the kitchen and said, "You better hurry or they'll all be gone." In any case, I would like to publicly slobber all over Jeff (in a strictly figurative sense) for having had the opportunity to ingest a couple of the above poorly described donuts.

Heading 2: (To further set the stage - because I like being on stage - in the desperate hope of making others believe that what follows will somehow be worth reading)

While I don't have any experience in donut eating (I've only seen them in bakeries), I've always been a cookie eater and believe that my experience with cookies will allow me to make you believe that I know enough about baked goods in general that my review will somehow be relevant to your donuts needs to influence your next donut purchase decision, and that my sparse use of periods will cause enough confusion in your mind that you'll miss the key point at the beginning of this run-on sentence about my total lack of experience in donut eating.

With those (generally uninteresting except to myself) provisos, as well as my digestive system limitations which I need not go into in any great detail, and other utterly worthless utterances in mind, dear reader, please accept my apologies in advance for not comparing the Britts Donuts to 47 different cookies such that you would become as completely and hopelessly confused as I unadmittedly am about donuts, or cookies, or whatever it is that I'm trying to review.

Pics: (to be posted once Duggeh emails them to me)

Utter utterances:

These donuts really tasted good! They were extremely well baked, or fried, I'm not sure which, and of ample proportion to satisfy a variety of hungers. They fit my hand well, and melted away in my mouth. (More on that in the taste section below).

Taste:

I'm going to have to seriously think about becoming a donut eater! It is impossible not be enjoy the taste of Britts Donuts! I'd eat fistfuls of them every day if I lived anywhere near Carolina Beach, even if it put me into a diabetic coma. Certainly, the Britts Donuts donut is a much better donut than any cookie I had available to try (including some Famous Amos mini chocolate chip cookies that Jeff generously provided for my consumption and comparison). If the Britts Donut donut was baked as a cookie, I'd add milk and enjoy it more than any other cookie I've ever eaten.

The sugar used in the glaze is VERY sugary; as sweet as can be without being overly sweet, and with a nice tactile feel that feels sticky and crumbly all at the same time. I couldn't help but to lick my fingers and wish that the donut hadn't yet reached my tummy, but could be put back on my lips to do a do-over. The Britts Donut provides a terrific taste for any of you who are experienced donut eaters. I would definitely consider Britts Donuts as my vendor of choice for all of my donut needs if I lived closer to Carolina Beach.

If it wasn't for nit pickers, we would all be knee-deep in nits:

There has to be something that I don't like about the Britt Donuts small, round (with a hole in the middle) glazed donut that I don't like, or you might possibly think that I'm posting this review to shill their products. So, well, here goes... I've got to admit, they seem to have a (not so serious, but I'll point it out anyway) bit of difficulty in making a dozen donuts of equal size and proportion. Let me just put it this way: some of them are bigger than others, and by the time I got to the bag, most of the big ones seemed to have been picked over. I was able to overcome this problem (such that it was a problem) by grabbing two (2) donuts and using one (1) of my oversized paws to cuff the second donut (thus concealing it from the view of others) while I scarfed down the first donut with my other paw. Still, this could potentially become a more serious issue with a different crowd of more gentle, considerate, and community minded people (i.e., people who were not all doing the exact same thing I was doing with the double dipping trick).

Now for the final plug:

I feel bad that this review is about 12 pages of jibberish short of my normal review, and that I didn't have any other donuts to compare the Britts Donut donut to, so I feel, dear readers, that I probably could have done a better job of droning on than I have, but if you're a donuts lover, I can't imagine that you wouldn't rather enjoy Britts Donut donuts, especially with milk. I wish that I had thought about buying some milk while I was in town earlier this morning...

[NightWoundsTime]

You're a funny mofo sometimes. Why doesn't this Wayne show up on my couch more often. Instead I get the Wayne who drones on about trailer repairs.

[Sherwood]

Thx 4 tha reveiw WMcmaster. How do these compare to sandwiches?

[luvdunhill]

Would you say these are 10% better than Krispy Kremes?

[deepak]

On a scale of 9 to 10 I give these doughnuts a 9.

[Wmcmanus]

Would you say these are 10% better than Krispy Kremes?

I've never eaten any donuts before. Are Krispy Kreme donuts better than your favorite cookies?

[Duggeh]

Best. Post. Ev4r.

[grawk]

Would you say these are 10% better than Krispy Kremes?

I'm a big fan of krispy Kreme and I'd say they're a 6 to britt's 10

[morphsci]

I'm selling all my gear to buy Britts Donuts donuts.

[boomana]

imho, they were just okay: a bit chewy and a tad too sweet. I think the fact that others were either drunk or very hungry had much to do with their appeal.

[guzziguy]

Heresy! Burn the witch.

[tyrion]

She is obviously a cookie eater.

[helleke]

"I've always been a cookie eater and believe that my experience with cookies will allow me to make you believe that I know enough about baked goods in general that my review will somehow be relevant to your donuts needs to influence your next donut purchase decision..."

everyone everything have first time,if you don't try,you will have nothing new.

[manaox2]

Fucking diet, I even had to watch Colin lick up the leftover sugar before popping whoppers out of a jug. I'm sure no one there would have thought I was restraining myself.

Wayne wanted/needed a bigger hole, I personally would have enjoyed some custard filled.

[Dusty Chalk]

imho, they were just okay: a bit chewy and a tad too sweet. I think the fact that others were either drunk or very hungry had much to do with their appeal.

This is as I suspected, thank you for confirming my unfounded opinion.

[grawk]

The chewy exterior and perfect interior are what made them good, imho. And I was neither hungry nor drunk when I had them.

[Duggeh]

imho, they were just okay: a bit chewy and a tad too sweet. I think the fact that others were either drunk or very hungry had much to do with their appeal.

As the perpetually sober and never hungry overlord to you donut scoffing colonials, I must protest.

Those doughnuts may have caused a physically tactile sensation of the walls of the coronary artieries hardening up, but they were muchos tasty.

However. They were nto as good as a YumYum. Visitors to Scotland may taste yumYums.

[The Monkey]

I wanted to smear those donuts all over my body.

[grawk]

wanted to? Do I need to post those pictures?

[jinp6301]

PIX PLZ

[Augsburger]

Please restrain yourself 'til after I have had a few Cognacs. Dan, what's with your "edit"?

[Duggeh]

PIX PLZ

Doughnut pic.

[deepak]

Fucking diet, I even had to watch Colin lick up the leftover sugar before popping whoppers out of a jug. I'm sure no one there would have thought I was restraining myself.

Wayne wanted/needed a bigger hole, I personally would have enjoyed some custard filled.

Yeah about Collin popping whoppers out of a bag...didn't think they allowed that in his line of work

[Fitz]

Yeah about Collin popping whoppers out of a bag...didn't think they allowed that in his line of work

Yeah, I was a bit surprised to see him poppin' whoppers too... but to each his own.

[MexicanDragon]

I'm a Krispy Kreme fan. I disagree with the host and lean towards the findings of Vicki. These were all hand-made to KK's factory production. I think the OP would find pleasure in visiting a Krispy Kreme. (There was one on the way to the shooting range/possibly airport as well). KK would have a doughnut (as opposed to Dunkin' Donuts' 'donut' spelling) tolerance of roughly 3%, as opposed to the ~25% variance of Britt's.

The taste was pretty good, though I still prefer KK. A large problem was these was a grossly inconsistent texture. The aforementioned chewey texture was countered with a spattering of areas that were a bit over done. The variances are deeper than this, but you'l just have to go out and try one or two (dozen) for yourself.

The reason I think the OP would enjoy a KK is 1) the consistency of the doughnut and 2) the wide range of flavours (Brrittts' has only glazed, iirc, where KK has a variety closer to that of the amount of cookies Wayne has eaten and compared before.

I'd say 6-7/10 tops on the Doughnut-gon scale.

**BRENT**